Conclusion…If you have stuck through all 6,000+ words in this series of post God bless you. They were more for me than you but I posted them anyways, hopefully they can help someone else
Yesterday I had my appointment. It went well, I had a lot of anxiety the morning before and cried buckets during but it went well. It was exhausting. It is so hard asking for help sometimes. I like the lady I will be working with…she defiantly thinks going back on medication would be a good thing for me and has set me up next week to speak with the psychiatrist for this. She is also going to talk to her before hand so that I don’t have to completely go over everything again with her. We have another appointment set up for a therapy session in two weeks. Due to the reaction I was having talking with the other lady a few months ago we decided that it would be better to go bi-weekly instead of weekly so that I have more of a break in-between. I am a strong believer in therapy if you go in there open. It’s not easy and can be very painful but I know it can help. You get what you put into it but its in no way, shape or form a quick fix…even with medication. You cant just do medication either. They are meant to work together.I have not started any meds yet and yesterday's session was exhausting.It left me feeling very drained, thankfully my daughter for once is having a weekend at her dad's so I laid down for a nap at 5pm yesterday and ended up waking up around 11 eating some soup and going back to sleep until about 6:30 this morning.(and obviously decided I needed to do some writing lol)
This journey is at times more a mental one than a physical one. There is a reason we choose to over eat and hide within our bodies. If you don’t fix why you ended up this way in the first place and deal with those demons while you may have some success you will not keep it.
I think I have given everyone enough to read for today so I will stop. Some of these thoughts have consumed me lately and letting them all out has defiantly lifted some weight off my shoulders.
For now I am going to focus less on the weight loss part of my journey and more on the emotional part. If I feel like going to the gym I will, if not that will be ok too. For now.
Peace, Love and Happy Blogging